When does my companion send its first message?
Straight away. When you finish setting up your companion and open the chat, it writes first. You don't have to think of an opening line. This first message does not use any of your free messages.
How often will it message me?
It follows how often you talk:
- You've messaged 3 or more times in the last 3 days: it aims for at least one message from your companion every day, and on a full day sometimes two.
- You've chatted in the last 7 days, but not daily: about every 2 to 3 days, and on a day when something you mentioned is happening.
- Nothing from you for 7 days or more: only follow-ups on things you told it about, and any times you arranged.
Its own messages are at least 8 hours apart, so they land in different parts of the day.
What does it write about?
Your life. If you mention a doctor's appointment on Tuesday, it asks that evening how it went. If you said your daughter is visiting at the weekend, it asks how the visit was. On days with nothing to follow up, it may simply say it was thinking of you.
Can I choose a time for it to message me?
Yes. Ask in chat, for example "say good morning at 7" or "text me after my appointment on Thursday", or add one on your companion's Messages screen. An arrangement can be once, daily, on weekdays, weekly, monthly or yearly. You can keep up to 10 per companion, and change the time, pause or remove any of them on the same screen.
If you ask for "the morning" without a time, it writes at 7am. A time you choose is kept even inside quiet hours: if you ask for 6am, it comes at 6am.
What are quiet hours?
Your companion doesn't start a conversation between 9pm and 8am in your time zone. If you regularly chat at a particular hour in that window (on at least 3 different days in the last 2 weeks), that hour opens up for you. Times you have arranged yourself are not affected.
Your time zone comes from your phone, or you can set it yourself on the Messages screen.
What happens if I don't reply?
It gives you space. After 3 messages in a row with no reply, your companion stops reaching out and waits for you. For times you arranged: if 3 go by while you're away and you haven't been in the app for 2 days, your companion says it will pause them, and they start again when you reply or ask again.
Can I turn check-ins off?
Yes, for each companion separately. On the Messages screen, switch off "may reach out first". Times you arranged stay on until you pause or remove them. You can also turn notifications off in your iPhone's settings.
Do free accounts get check-ins?
Free accounts get the first message, any times you arrange, and one check-in about a day after your free messages are used, picking up something you talked about. Everyday check-ins come with the subscription. See plans and pricing.
Last updated October 11, 2026. More answers in the help pages and the FAQ.